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With the warmer weather approaching, we’re getting closer and closer to “wedding season”. Brides and grooms are putting together the final touches for their big day and doing the big countdown to make sure they don’t forget anything. It’s a good thing they have their family and friends helping out — and when you’re asked to be a bridesmaid, that means you’re being asked to take more active roll than just any friend.
Being a bridesmaid seems to have this bad wrap associated with it. People complain that they have to deal with “bridezillas”, have to fork out lots of cash for an ugly dress they’ll only wear once, and it’s work. I don’t see it all so negatively though. There are some reasons why you should be happy you’re a bridesmaid because sometimes — it’s a job that totally rocks.
Here are 5 big reasons why being a bridesmaid rocks:
1. It is a big deal and they asked YOU
Guess what? Life’s not all about you and in this case, you should be thrilled you were asked. Yes, it means some added responsibility and maybe a little extra cash, but you’ve got someone in your life who you are close enough with that they want you there. It’s a big deal to them and it’s a big deal they asked you.
2. Bachelorette party
Not only do you get to plan a really fun bachelorette party — and let’s face it, planning can be just as fun — but you’re also going to the party! A bachelorette party is a night you’re going to remember for a long time, and spending that time and making those memories with your close friends is totally worth it.
3. A great way to meet new people
If you’re looking for a partner or are just interested in meeting new people, a wedding is a good place to start. As a bridesmaid, you’re already standing out as an important player at the event and that makes for great a conversation-starter.
4. Best seat in the house
Weddings are romantic and filled with happy-vibes and a lot of love. As a bridesmaid, you get to stand right up next to the action and see all of it up close. You get the best seat in the reception area where you will be served first (AKA: you won’t have to pick through the buffet leftovers like the people sitting in the back of the room).
5. They’ll owe you a favor
Sometimes having a favor owed in your back pocket is enough to suck up wearing that fluffy blue dress that you can’t wait to get out of.
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Did you look up today and note with surprise that you aren’t where you thought you would be at this point in life? Or perhaps you were surprised by an amazing conversation with someone who is not your partner and you’d forgotten how wonderful it felt to sparkle and be mentally engaged in discussion.
Life can feel like a long bus journey in the space of a few moments. Its so easy to get distracted or tired along the way and quit looking for the flags and posted warning signs like “CAUTION: End of Road in 10 Feet!” Or “Last Gas Station for 300 miles.” Or even “Rooster Crossing.” After all, you can trust your bus driver to know the way, right?
Only if you know for sure that you got on the right bus with the right driver.
I have an opinion about bus drivers. You may only see the signs of a bad one driving in certain neighborhoods. On the highway, it seemed like you had a great bus driver, but once you entered into the tighter streets of life, you found that you were getting tossed around a lot more than you expected. They blow through stop signs, take the shadiest routes they can find or even crash into a car or two along the way, whereas, on the highway, they could have been filming a bus driver training video. I think that you have the same driver, but the true nature of that driver has become apparent in the tighter turns of life.
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There is one bus driver that almost always takes people by surprise. He looks like Mr. Average Jo and all of our music, TV and movies celebrate this guy. He’ll make you feel like the loneliest person in the world – with someone but not really connected. You wake up thinking you are going to break up with this person the next time you see them but by the end of the day’s one on one time, you wonder in the haze of satisfaction why you would ever think about breaking it off. Or perhaps you know that you are only connecting between the sheets and can’t remember how to even talk to the other person accepting that this is all you are going to get. It could be worse, right? Its easy to forget that no ride lasts forever and when the bus eventually runs out of gas you’ll be left stranded on the road with a virtual stranger who you aren’t sure you even trust.
Meet Lust. Lust is an experienced bus driver but likes to blithely ignore stop signs, rarely if ever yields to other cars and is more likely to mow down the pedestrian than stop to let them pass. This bus route starts off driving through the most beautiful scenery imaginable and has you wanting to take pictures at every turn. You feel like you are on top of the world and have finally found the road you were always meant to take. You may take a turn or hill slightly fast, but it just gives you that delicious squirmy feeling in your tummy. But once you crest the hill, the downhill ride can become scary and at times downright dangerous.
Lust tends to be an aggressive driver and in worst case scenarios, blind. The ride can descend into something you never thought you would ever participate in. You’ll be asked to give up all connection to personal safety and self esteem. You’ll feel like Sandra Bullock in Speed by the end of this bus ride… exhausted, abused and triumphant to be off the bus!
It’s hard not to get back on this bus since the road feels so good at the beginning of everything, but you’ll get off this bus feeling alone, dirty and used every time since it never even got close to touching your heart.
Top 5 Signs your bus driver’s name is Lust:
You know more about what your partner likes in bed than you do about their recent work or life events.
You solve most if not all problems by retiring to the bedroom (or couch, or table, or floor… where ever your fancy takes you.)
For the most part, you don’t feel cherished when you are sexually active. It feels more like fking than making love.
You want to stop but can’t seem to figure out how.
You are compromising on things that you never thought you would…
Stay tuned for tomorrow and I’ll introduce a different bus driver or two….
This is scary because it’s true. A basic primer to me, in case anyone was wondering. Except my eyebrows are considerably less frightening.
Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz…
You Are a Bette!
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You are a Bette — “I must be strong”
Bettes are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.
How to Get Along with Me
Stand up for yourself… and me.
Be confident, strong, and direct. Don’t gossip about me or betray my trust.
Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side. Give me space to be alone.
Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don’t flatter me. I often speak in an assertive way. Don’t automatically assume it’s a personal attack.
When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that’s just the way I am.
What I Like About Being a Bette
being independent and self-reliant
being able to take charge and meet challenges head on being courageous, straightforward, and honest
getting all the enjoyment I can out of life supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
upholding just causes
What’s Hard About Being a Bette
overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don’t intend to
being restless and impatient with others’ incompetence sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
never forgetting injuries or injustices putting too much pressure on myself
getting high blood pressure when people don’t obey the rules or when things don’t go right
Bettes as Children Often
are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
are sometimes loners seize control so they won’t be controlled
figure out others’ weaknesses attack verbally or physically when provoked
take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings
Bettes as Parents
are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
are sometimes overprotective
* can be demanding, controlling, and rigid
